The Pecan Park Eagle Cartoon All Stars

Good Afternoon, 2016 new season baseball fans!

It’s about time to start another play-on-life baseball season soap opera by spanking the baby with another breath-imparting first pitch. Hope everybody’s ready for the emotionally sudsy ride, especially in Houston, where the prospects of a shooting star and astro-filled orange sky come October have never been brighter. We could not possibly cartoon the best moments of what appears yet to come because of the physical laws governing time and space separation – and the slim, but all important difference between – what we think may happen from our present day perspective – and what actually happens in the immediate six months of tomorrows that lay out-of-sight before us on this date, April 3, 2016.

As a result, we shall simply content ourselves this morning with drawing conclusions from that other time zone that serves our electronic media so handily. That is, whatever happened in the past, starting with the event that happened an hour or 24 hours ago – and all the way back to Eden or the Big Bang – depending on one’s point of view about whenever everything really got started.

We shall use the past impressions of childhood here to present The Pecan Park Eagle Cartoon All Stars – by lineup and ancillary personnel. Please join us now in hearing range of this digital megaphone for the following introductions:

The Lineup

Rpadie "Meep-Meep" Roadrunner

Roadie “Meep-Meep” Roadrunner, SS

  1.  Roadie “Meep-Meep” Roadrunner, SS ~ With incredible range in the middle infield, Roadie has a home-to-first best-time of 1.01 seconds. Anything he hits that cannot be caught on the fly is a potential home run, if not handled perfectly.

    Wile E. Coyote, LF

    Wile E. Coyote, LF

  2. Wile E. Coyote, LF ~ A genuine table setter in the lineup, Wile always brings his own knife and fork. Aided by the extra momentum he derives from batting directly behind Roadie Roadrunner, Wile’s hitting improved by .075 points last season. Wile credits the book he purchased from Acme Publishing, “How To Avoid Indigestion While Eating On The Run”, for his .325 mark last season. With his own good running times, Wile sometimes is able to bump Roadie into his uncatchable hyper-speed pace, and sometimes allowing the “burner-bird” to score from first base on a Coyote swinging bunt.

    Popeye "The Sailor" Mann, 1B

    Popeye “The Sailor” Mann, 1B

  3. Popeye “The Sailor” Mann, 1B ~ Acquired from San Diego in the off-season (Where else do you find sailors who can hit?), Popeye is the best slugging 1st baseman since Jeff Bagwell. In fact a lot of people think he has the same arms and stance as the former great Astros (hopefully) future Hall of Famer.

    Casey "At-The-Bat-Only" Dooditt, DH

    Casey “At-The-Bat-Only” Dooditt, DH

  4. Casey “At-The-Bat-Only” Dooditt, DH ~ Our Casey is not to be confused with his cousin back in Mudville, Casey “At-The-Bat-Only” Didunt. When our Casey’s Pieville club defeated Mudville, 4-2, in the famous game that sucked the joy from that earthy named place with a grand slam home run that stood up in the face of a failed Mudville rally in the ninth, it was our Dooditt slammer from Pieville that did it!

    Charley Brown, 3B Snoop Dogg. Mascot

    Charley Brown, 3B
    Snoop Dogg. Mascot

  5. Charlie Brown, 3B ~ Signed for mere peanuts, Charlie Brown has turned into a real spark plug at the hot corner – and, batting behind “Our Casey”, he is expected to become our second speedy lead off man in the lineup. In the featured photo, we see Charlie clowning around at his position with his pet and the club’s mascot, Snoopy “Snoop” Dogg.  We have no clue as to what he plans to do with that bat at 3rd base.

    Mighty Mouse, CF

    Mighty Mouse, CF

  6. Mighty Mouse, CF ~ Forget “The Catch” by Willie Mays in the 1954 World Series. When our Cartoon-Club’s defensive need arises, its “death to all other flying things” for the most redemptive airborne rodent in the history of biological anomalies. Anytime an enemy striker connects on a moon-bound baseball, our Cartoon-Club manager only has to grab the dugout phone and shout, “sending out a call to you-know-who … sending out a call to you-know-who” …. and guess what? … “Here he comes to save the day …. by tracking the ball down on the fly and making the sensational catch!”

    Donald Duck, 2B

    Donald Duck, 2B

  7. Donald Duck, 2B ~ Who’s got the glove at his position? ~ One guess, guess who! ~ Who’s got the softest kind of sweet glove touch? ~ Who never tries to trip the runners much? ~ Who makes the pivot ~ on the double play? ~ Who gets the throw to first ~ on time each day? ~ Who only errors ~ in a game of bad luck? ~ No one ~ but Donald Duck!

    Lucy Van Pelt, RF

    Lucy Van Pelt, RF

  8. Lucy Van Pelt, RF ~ Lucy is our most versatile starter. She covers right field well; also removes all flowers in her area that could divert a hard-hit grounder into becoming a tough to reach rolling extra base hit; and she also offers psychiatric help to bleacher fans between innings for five cents an opinion.

    Goofy Mann, C

    Goofy “Dog Face” Guy, C

  9. Goofy “Dog Face” Guy, C ~ Is he a dog that dresses like a man? ~ Or is he a man with a face and ears like a dog? ~ We don’t know? ~ All we know is ~ he’s the best catcher we could find! ~ But isn’t that how it often is these days with catchers? ~ If you can find one that handles pitchers and throws out runners well – he can’t hit your grandmother’s age! ~ If you find one that can hit .280 or better ~ well ~ he throws out runners the way hoarders throw out trash! ~ Uh! ~ Right, Astros?

    Raymond "Bugs" Bunny Starting Pitcher

    Raymond “Bugs” Bunny
    Starting Pitcher

  10. Raymond “Bugs” Bunny, SP ~ Each batter he faces is a “carrot vs. stick” encounter, but he is very good at escaping the high pitch count holes he get into with his uncanny rabbit ball mind and experience with same. Every time he induces another high pop fly with his rising fast ball, Bugs always like to grab a carrot chomp from his glove-hidden orange treat bag and loudly ask the batter as he jogs hopelessly down the first base line in frustration ~ “Eh … (chomp. chomp. chomp) … What’s Up, Doc?”

    Casper "The Ghost" Friendly Reliever/Closer

    Casper Friendly
    Reliever/Closer

  11. Casper “The Ghost” Friendly, RP/Closer ~ On those occasions in which starter Bugs Bunny needs help, opponents don’t have a ghost of a chance against reliever/closer Casper Friendly. ~ Who wouldn’t have trouble hitting a full house of great pitches that came to the plate as barely visible balls thrown by a barely visible pitcher?

    Mickey Mouse Field Manager

    Mickey Mouse
    Field Manager

  12. Mickey Mouse, Manager ~ Who else are we going to get to manage the “Mickey Mouse” team that we just put on the field? We also got Mickey in a cash deal from the Chicago Cubs. Mickey is actually an automaton who has been programmed with all the traits for winning baseball that have been derived from Cubs managers since Frank Chance stepped down as their Peerless Leader after the 1912 season.

    Pinocchio Corleone General Manager

    Pinocchio Corleone
    General Manager

  13. Pinocchio Corleone, General Manager ~ Our GM promises to keep our hopeful lineup in the annual AL pennant hunt by continuing to make each of them yearly contract offers that they cannot refuse, and, at the same time, he is equally committed to remaining honest with the owner, management, the players, the media, and the fans in all matters of importance to the team’s success.

    Porky Pigg Radio Broadcast Play-By-Play

    Porky Pigg
    Radio Broadcast
    Play-By-Play

  14. Porky “The Ham” Pigg ~ Porky Pigg has been signed to do the TV/radio simulcast play-by-play for the Cartoon-Club.

    Daddy Warbucks Club Owner

    Daddy Warbucks
    Club Owner

  15. Daddy Warbucks, Club Owner ~ A close friend and look-alike of Houston NFL Texans owner Bob McNair, Warbucks promises that his Cartoon Club baseball team will be in the hunt for the World Series every year, but he has requested that fans and media both need to stop asking him if he plans to sign a quarterback who can actually win games. Warbucks adds that quarterbacks  have no value to him whatsoever. – “Maybe that’s the baseball in me,” he added, “or maybe it also comes from hanging out with my buddy McNair since 2002! – Until he signed the QB from Denver, I was beginning to think that QBs had no importance to winning in football either.” mister-magoo
  16. Mr. Jim Backus Magoo ~ Umpire in Chief ~ Uh ~ who else gets this job? ~ It’s gotta be Big Jim Magoo!

pprky-thats-all____________________

eagle-0rangeBill McCurdy

Publisher, Editor, Writer

The Pecan Park Eagle

Houston, Texas

https://bill37mccurdy.com/

 

 

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3 Responses to “The Pecan Park Eagle Cartoon All Stars”

  1. Bill Gilbert’s Take on the 2016 Astros Season | The Pecan Park Eagle Says:

    […] Astros, Baseball History, and other Musings of Heart and Humor « The Pecan Park Eagle Cartoon All Stars […]

  2. gregclucas Says:

    Nicely done…

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