Best Physician of 2016: Dr. May Bee Di Suun

“If swimming good for figure, explain whale to me.”
~ Dr. May Bee Di Suun
Pappasito’s Banquet
Houston, Texas
December 18, 2016

Thanks to a referral from Dr. Edward Szymczak of Binge Horizons HealthCare Options, Houston now has a new primary care physician available to local members of this new economy health care advantage program in the metro area. Here’s how Dr. May Bee Di Suun answered health questions last night from those who attended his “Welcome to Houston” banquet at Pappasito’s on the Katy Freeway @ Sam Houston Parkway:

Q: Doctor, I’ve heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Heart only good for so many beats, and that it… Don’t waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want to live longer? Take nap.

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: Oh no. Wine made from fruit. Brandy distilled wine, that mean they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain. Bottom up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have body and you have fat, your ratio one to one. If you have two body, your ratio two to one.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can’t think of single one, sorry. My philosophy: No pain…good!

Q: Aren’t fried foods bad for you?

A: YOU NOT LISTENING! Food fried in vegetable oil. How getting more vegetable be bad?

Q
 : Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Oh no! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only be doing sit-up if you want bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: You crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming good for figure, explain whale to me.

Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! ‘Round’ is shape!

Well… I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.

 And remember:

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways – Chardonnay in one hand – chocolate in the other – body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming “WOO-HOO! WHAT A RIDE!!”

AND…..

 For those of you who watch what you eat, here’s the final word on nutrition and health. It’s a relief to know the truth after all of those conflicting nutritional studies.

 1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

 2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

 3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

 4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans…

 5. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

CONCLUSION:Eat and drink what you like.Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

____________________

Authorship Note: We don’t know the name of the originator of the above featured questions, answers, and doctor photo. Otherwise, we would gladly have extended proper credit to the funny mind that came up with this refreshing smile-maker. All we did was give the doctor a name and place his exposure to these questions in an organizational and familiar Houston setting.The Q&A heart of this little play was sent to me today by Ed Szymczak, one of my fellow classmates from the St. Thomas High School Class of 1956. – Thanks forever, Eddie!

Get in the Christmas spirit! Stop pigging out on broccoli!

____________________

eagle-0range
 Bill McCurdy

Publisher, Editor, Writer

The Pecan Park Eagle

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2 Responses to “Best Physician of 2016: Dr. May Bee Di Suun”

  1. Tom Hunter Says:

    Maybe die soon if you follow the “doctor’s” advice.

  2. David Munger Says:

    Patient to Dr., my arm hurts when I move it up and down,. Dr. to Patient, no move you arm like that, no hurt no more.. Korean Hee Haw.

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