A Nose Is A Nose Is a Nose – And They All Smell!

After surgery vaulted The Pecan Park Eagle into an older version of Jack Nicholson in 1974's "Chinatown" last week, we have been giving some thought to our prosthetic and magical options for a new nose.

After surgery vaulted The Pecan Park Eagle into an older version of Jack Nicholson in 1974’s “Chinatown” last week, we have been giving some thought to our prosthetic and magical options for a new nose.

At first, we could do nothing but mourn he loss of our finely chiseled, pre-surgical profile, but, since vanity has always been a short waltz on our dance card, we rapidly moved on to the thought of the new doors that have now opened to us by fate.

At first, I could do nothing but mourn the loss of my finely chiseled, pre-surgical profile, but, since vanity has always been a short waltz on my dance card, I rapidly moved on to my hopes and dreams for a new nose – and all of the exciting doors that have now opened to me by fate with each unfolding option.

We quickly paused at the most obvious choice of simply learning to live with the altered face that now rests upon the same still whole self that we truly are - If our friend in Egypt can live without a nose for a millennium or two, shouldn't we able to do the same for a far shorter period of time?

I quickly paused at the most obvious choice of simply learning to live with the altered face that now rests upon the same still whole self that I truly am! – If our millennial-age-measured old friend in Egypt can live without a nose for a couple of centuries because of Napoleon’s cannons, shouldn’t we able to do the same for a far shorter period of time?

Still, at first, we could not resist the attraction to other compensatory  choices. As a lover of travel and eating on the go, we strongly considered the utility of the anteater's nose. It was a quick pass. We like to get our protein from the flesh of higher life forms.

Still, at first, I could not resist the attraction to other compensatory choices. As a lover of travel and eating on the go, I strongly considered the utility of the anteater’s nose. It was a quick pass. I like to get my protein from the cooked flesh of higher life forms.

A copy of the famous Jimmy Durante nose caught our eye. And why not? If it could inspire that famously happy Durante smile every time Jimmy looked in the mirror, look what it could do for us. Why we could "start of each day with a song, even when things go wrong!"

A copy of the famous Jimmy Durante nose caught my eye. And why not? If it could inspire that famously happy Durante smile every time Jimmy looked in the mirror, look what it could do for any of us. Why we could “start of each day with a song, even when things go wrong!”

A copy of the chrome nose of our literally favorite driving llfe force drew some brief rumbling and shiny consideration, but that would made our presence in the driver's seat a sheer act of redundancy.

A copy of the chrome nose of my literally favorite driving life force drew some brief rumbling and shiny consideration, but that step would have made my presence in the driver’s seat seem to beĀ  a sheer act of redundancy.

The design of Lee Marvin's silver nose in "Cat Ballou" drew my interest because of its no-surgery-required wearing simplicity, but those attachment straps riding beneath the eyes also got my attention as distractions to peripheral vision.

The design of Lee Marvin’s silver nose in “Cat Ballou” drew my interest because of its no-surgery-required wearing simplicity, but those attachment straps riding beneath the eyes also caught my attention as serious distractions to peripheral vision.

The humor of W.C. Field's nose as a humorous model for my replacement was almost irresistible! W.C. Fields to Bartender: "OH, bartender, did I spend a twenty dollar bill in here last night?" Bartender: "You sure did!:" W.C. Fields: "What a relief! I was afraid I had lost it!"

The laughter of W.C. Field’s nose as a humorous model for my replacement was almost irresistible!
W.C. Fields to Bartender: “Oh, bartender, did I spend a twenty dollar bill in here last night?”
Bartender: “You sure did!:”
W.C. Fields: “What a relief! I was afraid I had lost it!”

I always liked Pinocchio's nose until it stretched his conscience for telling lies. - I never lie, but I am concerned that the nose-growing effect might also be triggered by the occasional use of hyperbole in my written  storytelling.

I always liked Pinocchio’s nose until it stretched his conscience for telling lies. – I never lie, but I am concerned that the nose-growing effect might also be triggered by the occasional use of hyperbole in my written storytelling.

In spite of everything else, I always liked Nixon for his passionate interest in baseball. I also liked his nose as a model, but decided against it too as a bad choice. I could not use it. - I am not a crook!

In spite of everything else, I always liked Nixon for his passionate interest in baseball. I also liked his nose as a model, but decided against it too as a bad choice. I could not use it. – I am not a crook!

The nose of Cyrano de Bergerac caused him to hide in the shadows from love and to write for the hearts of others who could not express their passions as he did. I'd simply love to have his talent for expressing passion for myself. Love is the biggest message that needs to get out there, even it comes at the price of having a nose that looks a lot like the nose of Bob Hope!

The nose of Cyrano de Bergerac caused him to hide in the shadows from love and to write for the hearts of others who could not express their passions as he did. I’d simply love to have his talent for expressing passion for myself. Love is the biggest message that needs to get out there, even if it comes at the price of having a proboscis that looks a lot like the nose of Bob Hope!

Truth to tell, I haven't really lost my nose. It's just being reconfigured by surgery. My decision is to simply accept what I cannot change, let my pal Rudy keep leading the team, while I sit back in the sleigh with everyone else who drives their own sleigh too - and just keep on giving back what I am able to give to life - for as long as I can do it. -  ~ Happy Holidays, Everybody! ~

Truth to tell, I haven’t really lost my nose. It’s just being reconfigured by surgery. My decision is to simply accept what I cannot change, let my pal Rudy keep leading the team, while I sit back in the sleigh with everyone else who drives their own sleigh too – and just keep on giving back what I am able to give to life – for as long as I can do it. –
~ Happy Holidays, Everybody! ~

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3 Responses to “A Nose Is A Nose Is a Nose – And They All Smell!”

  1. Bobby Copus Says:

    have you thought about the mask worn by one Hannibal Lecter in The Silence of the Lambs?

  2. Mike Says:

    Bill,

    A nose by any other name, would be a cheat!

    I knows.

    MIke

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