Texas Gov. Miriam “Ma” Ferguson
Miriam “Ma” Ferguson was elected as the first female Governor of the State of Texas in 1924 after her husband, Gov. James Ferguson was impeached and convicted of various improprieties in that same post. Running on a special election slogan that stated to the voters, “now you can have two governors for the price of one,” Ma was elected to her first term. She would subsequently be defeated after her first term (1925-27), for one thing, purportedly selling gubernatorial pardons, but she would later return for second helpings (1932-35). Ma’s not so famous memorable words are now suspected as fiction created by opponents who wished to characterize her as an uncaring buffoon, but my dad always shared them in some form with me as one of the truths he the truth he learned about her while he was a student at St. Edward’s in Austin during her first term. Dad was also proud of the fact that the Governor and her husband once picked him up hitchhiking on Congress Avenue and took him to class at St. Ed’s in the governor’s limo.
And, back to subject, here are those not-so-famous, but quite memorable words (or one version of them):
Asked by the press why she failed to support the initiation of bilingual education in the heavily Latino populated areas of South Texas, Ma Ferguson supposedly answered: “There’s no need for it. If English was good enough for Jesus Christ, it ought to be good enough for the school children of Texas.”
Sometimes memorable words are the result of so-called “Freudian slips” of the tongue, when people speak out the unintended unconscious feelings they are having about a given moment in time. One of these moments probably occurred on May 22, 1971, when former President Lyndon Johnson was personally showing former President Richard Nixon around the grounds of the new LBJ Library in Austin on its dedication day. If you’ve ever seen the video of that moment, no explanation will be necessary. One-on-one, LBJ was practically shoving the somber, but smiling Nixon from room to room, with his loud drawling voice leaving no room for hearing anything the silent Nixon may have wanted to say or ask.
The “slip” was an easy spot for all of us who both saw the presidential walk-around and then heard Nixon speak these words at the mike during the dedication ceremony. It came quick. In Nixon’s very first uttered sentence:
“A few minutes ago, while President Johnson was throwing me through this beautiful new library…”
Long Before NCIS LA
Several years ago, in the ordinary, everyday local news broadcast world of reporting the latest cops and robbers events to their listeners, a Los Angeles radio broadcaster, whose name I’ve long since forgotten, finished up his report with words about the apprehension that I have found it impossible to forget:
“The arrest was made by Sgt. Joe Friday, a defective of the Los Angeles Police Farce.” *
* That’s right. I forgot the arresting officer’s actual name too. See “Freudian slip” explanation above for a deeper understanding of why I may have forgotten.
Paul Richards
A good example here is pretty well-known in Houston and among baseball people, but it is worthy of an even larger recollection because of its wittiness. When the great Paul Richards was fired as General Manager of the Houston Astros in 1965 because the club did not live up to the expectations of principal owner Judge Roy Hofheinz, he was apparently inconsolable and angry over his abrupt dismissal. If memory serves, our nationally famous writer Mickey Herskowitz tried to help calm Richards with words that went along this familiar trail:
“Take it in stride, Paul,” said Mickey Herskowitz, in words to this effect, “sometimes the Judge is his own worst enemy!”
“Not as long as I’m alive, he isn’t!” Richards quickly responded.
Dorothy Parker
And finally, for now, there’s one attributed to 1920s writer Dorothy Parker that will probably remain my all time favorite for its genius wit and spontaneity. Parker was a regular member of the Algonquin Club during the 1920s. The club amounted to a group of Manhattan writers who gathered at the Algonquin Hotel to drink lunch on an ongoing basis while they also shared stories and played mind games with each other. One day, the task was to make up complete sentences with certain obscure words that also contained an element of humor to them. Thinking they would stump Parker with this one, the word they gave her was “horticulture.”
Parker shot back immediately with, “You can lead a whore to culture, but you can’t make her think.”
Enough said.
I could go on all day, but will resist the possibility of again exceeding the attention spans of my readership, if, indeed, I have not done so already. Please kick in your own favorite memorable, but not-so-famous examples of words and thoughts worth remembering as comments on this column.
Tags: memorable quotes
The Pecan Park Eagle 
December 28, 2013 at 5:49 pm |
President Kennedy, speaking before a Houston crowd the night before his assassination, said that a rocket about to be launched by NASA would “carry the biggest payroll . . . payload into space.” After realizing his error, he added, “it will be the largest payroll, too.
December 29, 2013 at 12:55 am |
Tom – That one was the kind of Freudian utterance that slipped right into our wallets, but, if we never get anything beyond the satellite benefits to communication and weather studies we’ve already derived out of it, it was all worth it.
Happy new Year – Bill
December 29, 2013 at 12:05 am |
The one that I quote most often was offered by our then 7 or 8 year old Granddaughter to my husband when he was trying to make a king bed with 2 twins and was having difficulties making them fit. She said: “You know, Granddad, Life is hard!” Ah, the wisdom of youth!
December 29, 2013 at 12:47 am |
Shirley, that was just plain wonderful!
Happy New Year to you and Bill – and the entire Virdon family!
Peace and Love.