The Pecan Park Eagle

"What's that you say? I can't quite hear you."

In honor and celebration of this ghoulish celebration day, here’s my list of new baseball movies with icon titles, or variants thereof, borrowed from the horror film genre:. Don’t expect to find any of these titles on movies on Amazon,

(1) Nightmare on Crawford Street. Commissioner Selig finally approves the sale of the Houston Astros to Jim Crane and Company, but only under the condition that the club be moved to the American League West.

(2) Invasion of the Body Snatchers. The Yankees, Red Sox, and Cubs pay separate visits to the home of the Cardinals’ Albert Pujols.

(3) Them. The Boston Red Sox decide to borrow the title first used by the 1954 classic horror flick that told the story of Earth’s invasion by mutant monster ants that had had been spawned by radiation from atomic bomb testing. This time the movie is simply a Boston perspective on the New York Yankees.

(4) The Curse of Frankenstein. The story of how baseball acquired the “designated hitter” rule exception for regular use in the American League.

(5) The Mummy’s Curse. Jamie McCourt, the former Mrs. Frank McCourt, discusses in documentary form her new plans for the 50% interest she still holds as a result of the post divorce settlement with ex-bubbie Frank McCourt in the Los Angeles Dodgers.

(6) Night of the Living Dead. Barry Bonds, Roger Clemens, Mark McGwire, Rafael Palmiero, and Sammy Sosa, get together for a night on the town to discuss their individual chances for induction into the Baseball Hall of Fame  anytime sooner than the temperature hitting 32 degrees fahrenheit in Hades.

(7) The Boogeyman. A biographical dramatization on the life of Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig.

(8) The Exorcist. The story of Theo Epstein’s tenure as General Manager of the Boston Red Sox.

(9) The Exorcist II (in production): The story of Theo Epstein’s new tenure as General Manager of the Chicago Cubs.

(10) The Invisible Man.  In a stage play format movie, the Veterans Committee assembles for their annual review of former Players Association Executive Director Marvin Miller as a candidate for induction into the Baseball Hall of Fame.

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