The Pecan Park Eagle

Smooth Sailing: The Harvest of Synergy

In the broad field of psychological counseling services, there’s an ancient gauge on patient outcomes called “The Rule of Thirds.” The “rule” is straightforward in its prognostications. It says that, for all people from the general population who seek psychological help, one-third will get better; one-third will get worse; and one-third will stay pretty much the same as they were before services ever started.

So, what does this all mean? Does it mean that counseling and behavioral addiction treatment programs are a waste of time? Not necessarily. And certainly not so for people who possess both the desire and willingness to change, plus an experience that keeps shouting: “Something has to get better or I’m checking it all in.”

Some people live as though they inherently understand that life holds something good for them around the next corner. Other live as though they expect to get hit by a train at the next railroad crossing. Some live blandly, as though they never give hope or despair a single thought.

Recognize the “Rule of Thirds” in that last statement?

A thousand years ago, when I was still working as a very young member of the clinical faculty at Tulane University Medical School in New Orleans for the Department of Psychiatry and Neurology, I was privileged to meet a psychiatrist mentor named Dr. Don Gallant on my road to happy destiny. Dr. Gallant always loved delivering the following message to each new class of residents that came through the department:

“Doctors,” Gallant would say with a smile as he paced back and forth before the class, “most of you will go on from Tulane to private practice and your chosen work with people suffering from all kinds of mental pain. On your way, try to remember this little truism: You’re going to be much more successful, and a lot happier with your life, if you choose to spend most of your time working with people who are already on their ways to getting well. If you get tied down with people who are mostly committed to reaching the cemetery in spite of you and everything else, you are going to hate what you do.”

Dr. Gallant was right. He was also dancing all over the “Rule of Thirds.”

Gallant’s Formula: (1) Work mostly with people who want to get well and grow. (2) Try to help the suicidal group you serve also find reasons to stay alive. (3) Do what you can to help the stuck-in-neutral middle group to see that better or worse tomorrows hinge largely upon how much individual responsibility we each bring to the choices we make in life – over the few things we actually control.

The key behind what I call Gallant’s Formula is the Law of Synergy. Here are a couple of excellent definitions of how this potentiality force of nature works in human behavioral terms: (1) Synergy is the interaction of two or more agents or forces so that their combined effect is greater than the sum of their individual effects. (2) Synergy is the cooperative interaction among groups, especially among the acquired subsidiaries or merged parts of a corporation, that creates an enhanced combined effect.

Read more: http://www.answers.com/topic/synergy#ixzz1BrxVXiey

In other words, two or more positive energy fields, coming together in purpose, are more powerful than one. Working together, we can  avoid self-destruction, get out of neutral, boring ruts, and then go on to the accomplishment of what we were all intended to fulfill as the passion of our lives. Behind the propelling forces of synergy, even small sailing vessels shall find ways to take on the challenge of mighty oceans.

In my own adaptation of these principles to how I try to live my life, what I try to do is (1) only spend my time on activities and goals that I feel passionately about: and (2) do whatever I do, as much as possible, in the company of people who genuinely care as much about me as I do about them.

We don’t have to be on “BFF” terms to experience a synergizing relationship. Synergy is something that leaves us both of feeling fuller at the end of our time together. We may find that happening in a structured work relationship or a lecture hall as easily as we may find it hitting home with our so-called “best friends forever.” (BFF).

Warning! The relationships that hurt us most are the ones that deplete our energy supply on a regular basis. We get enough of that experience as parents going through our children’s’ adolescent periods. We cannot raise the world.

These deadly energy-depleting relationships are the ones we have with “high-maintenance people” – and that’s just another way of describing people who are either excessively dependent upon us – and/or else, those who are simply or complexly trying to use us to achieve their own selfish, often hidden agenda aims.

Stay away from the energy suckers as much as possible. Life’s too short for the invasion these people bring to your peace of mind.

Do all these things and you will transcend the “Rule of Thirds:” (1) You won’t end up as the golden voice who got lost on America’s street corner while waiting for a road map to the cemetery; (2) You won’t live out your boring life with nothing to look forward to beyond retirement; and (3) You will do something with your life that you only dreamed about forever, if you even thought about it at all.

Tags: change theory, Rule of Thirds, synergy

This entry was posted on January 23, 2011 at 3:38 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.