The Pecan Park Eagle

 

‘Twas the Week Before Astros Christmas

 

With Apologies to CLEMENT CLARKE MOORE

 

 

‘Twas the week before Christmas ~ at Minute Maid Park,

Not a firework was firing ~ not even a spark;

The deal socks were hung ~ by Jeff Luhnow with care,

In hopes that good traders ~ might soon find them there.

 

A few deals lay nestled ~ all snug in new beds;

As visions of sugar-plums ~ waltzed new Astro heads;

And Crane in his ‘kerchief ~ and Ryan in his cap,

Had settled their brains ~ for a long winter’s nap,

 

When out on the turf ~ there arose such a clatter,

All sprang from their beds ~ to see what’s the matter.

Away to their windows ~ they flew like a flash,

Tore open the shutters ~ and threw up the sash.

 

The moon on the breast ~ of the low clouds’ soft glow,

Cast a luster of midday ~ to all objects below,

When to wondering eyes ~ soon ~ to all did appear,

But a miniature sleigh ~ and eight tiny reindeer.

 

A.J. Hinch as the driver ~ stepped lively and quick,

All thought for a moment ~ he must be St. Nick!

More rapid than eagles ~ his coursers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted ~ and called them by name:

 

“Now, JOSE! ~ Now, CARLOS! ~ Now ALEX! ~ GEORGE SPRINGER!

On, JUSTIN! ~ On, GERRIT! ~ On, YULI! ~ Please BRING HER!

From the TOP of the FIRST! ~ To the LAST of the NINE!

Now dash away! ~ Dash away! ~ Dash away FINE!”

 

As the rains from old Harvey ~ once incessantly flew,

Please take to the sky again ~ with your remedy brew;

Go up to the rooftop ~ as you first coursers do,

And bring home the Series ~ with your Astros Sleigh Crew!

 

With the sleigh full of Astros ~ and A.J. Hinch too,

There was prancing and pawing ~ of each cleated shoe.

And then ~ in a twinkling ~ they gazed at the roof,

They only saw orange ~ for their full final proof.

 

As they drew in their heads ~ and were turning around,

Down the Jeff Luhnow chimney ~ they came with a bound.

Decked out in orange fur ~ from his head to his foot,

And his clothes were all tarnished ~ with ashes and soot.

 

Time to leave gifts ~ at the boss’s pavilion;

Hinch would trade them all now ~ for new talent gazillion.

But he knew these were gifts ~ nothing more to discuss;

You can’t buy new players ~ at the store ~ Toys R Us.

 

A bundle of those toys ~ he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a peddler ~ just opening his pack.

His eyes ~ how they twinkled! ~ His dimples ~ how merry!

His cheeks were like roses ~ his nose like a cherry!

 

His broad smiling mouth aimed at life ~ like a bow,

And his shaved lantern chin ~ waved his way in a glow;

The stump of a pipe ~ never dampened his teeth,

He would not abide smoking ~ like an early death wreath.

 

He spoke not a word ~ but went straight to his work,

And filled all the stockings; ~ then turned with a jerk,

And laying his finger ~ aside of his nose,

And giving a nod ~ up the chimney he rose;

 

He sprang to his sleigh ~ to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all flew ~ like the down of a thistle.

But all heard him exclaim ~ ‘ere he drove out of sight ~

“Happy Christmas to all ~ for a GREAT Astro Night!”

 

******************************

Bill McCurdy

Principal Writer, Editor, Publisher

The Pecan Park Eagle

 

Tags: 'Twas the Week Before Astros Christmas

This entry was posted on December 20, 2018 at 12:08 am and is filed under Baseball, culture, History. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.